some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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