just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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