Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
please come you make the beer taste better
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
