David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
