Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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