god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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