i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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