But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
