There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I need a burrito and a hug.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
