My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
