you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
