Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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