She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
