so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
