shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
