i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
