We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize