We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
someone threw a dead crab at me
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
