I got chris browned last night
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
