what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
