i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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