To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Is her dick bigger than yours?
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize