She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize