Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Randomize
