i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
