i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
