I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Randomize