take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize