you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Randomize
