miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
