my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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