we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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