She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
