Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
