so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
