I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I am full of burrito and curiosity
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
