Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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