Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
