STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize