I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
