Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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