At least make sure they are 18
Why
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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