I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Everclear isn't food dammit
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
