You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize