i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize