his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
