lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
