Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
they're like a gay fantastic four
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
