I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
You smell like stripper and shame
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
