but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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